by:  Nadia Gerassimenko

When I got my very own first cat, Sheldon, a ragdoll, I was going by my instinct, his endearing appearance, and descriptions I read about of how ragdolls are as feline creatures. I truly thought he was the one! Ragdolls are usually sociable, laid back, and cuddly. My Sheldon is not. While he is very sociable (he makes sure to make his presence known!), half the time I don’t know what he wants when he meows; he doesn’t want to cuddle, but he craves attention of some kind; he’s mostly bored and is laid back when he’s sleeping or “taking a shower.” Spending most of my hours in my house, having a cat who always seeks attention from me has proven to be very draining, whereas I have other responsibilities to take care of, including working from home. People told me—including the ragdoll community and my vet—get a second cat! But I felt that this wouldn’t be the solution for either of us.

Opportunity came knocking on my door. A friend of mine got a second kitten, but his first cat hated her and was abusing her viciously for several months, and time did not help them get along. He asked if we could take in Yolka (aka Spruce in Russian). I was excited because I felt a soulful connection with Yolka the first time I saw her. It was also an opportunity for me to see if Sheldon and Yolka could get along and if having a second cat around the house could keep Sheldon occupied and stimulated. But guess what? Because Yolka was traumatized by her previous experience, she did not like it when Sheldon was being too pushy while playing with her. And Sheldon felt confused and sad being rejected by his new friend. It was a mad house. And Sheldon was just as needy as before.

I thought about it a lot, and with a saddened heart, I had to give him to my in-laws knowing that they could provide him with an unconditionally loving and happy home. They adore him, and their house is big and exciting enough for him to explore new territories and keep being mentally challenged. He’s truly content there. And I’m happy just having Yolka around. We cuddle and play together. I actually understand her feline language. I don’t ever regret getting Sheldon—I love him—but it was a learning experience figuring out what’s best for him and what I can handle as a cat owner. There are other things I learned along the way, which are very common for new cat owners and, sometimes, even veterans. The most important thing to keep in mind is to think about what’s best for your purry companion, not what is convenient for you.       

Cats can indeed be disciplined

Cats aren’t trained the same way as dogs. You can yell at them all you want or finally throw a pillow at them in frustration, and they may temporarily cease the bad behavior. But then they’ll re-explore jumping on the table again—if that’s a problem for you— or waking you up at 4 am in the hopes of being fed or because they’re just plain bored, being night creatures and all. They’ll continue as long as you pay attention to them. To them, attention—positive or negative—is reinforcing. If you want them to stop waking you up at night, ignore them completely, pretend you’re a log, and repeat this until you see an effect. Now, they’ll make sure you’re still alive and may paw at you, stick their nose at your face, even bite you like my Sheldon does. Do not concede! And if you want your cat out of the table, take them as soon as you see them getting on it and softly but firmly say no. Repeat until it clicks. And when they do something good, empower them by petting them or giving them a little treat while communicating with them in a positive tone. Remember, all attention is a reinforcement. Lack thereof gets them bored eventually. Be patient with your kitty.  

Cats aren’t as independent as they appear

A person who doesn’t know the real nature of cats may find them tedious because all they do is sleep 16 hours a day and wash themselves the rest of the time. And they’re too “independent” unlike dogs. But that is not true at all. All kitties want and need connection with their cat owners. While they like to play on their own with their toys like hunters on a prowl, it is recommended for you to interact with them as well at least twice a day (try to squeeze in some game time in the morning if possible!). You can play catch, just like with dogs, or hide and go seek alternating your role between the hunter and the hunted. And while cats are domestic, they still like to feel as if they live in a forest with bushes to hide behind and trees to go up on like their ancestors. So get creative and make a jungle out of your home with cat trees in different rooms, decorated boxes where they can hide, special furniture arrangements from where they can pounce at you! Not only will this stimulate their ever-curious minds, keep them active, and prevent them from feeling bored and depressed, they will also feel like real wild cats. Hear them roar!     

If you won’t eat that, cats shouldn’t either

Imagine if a meal you’re buying for yourself has poultry by-product (it could be a pigeon for all we know!), synthetic coloring, and other ingredients you can’t even pronounce, would you buy and eat that? I didn’t think so. Would you feel comfortable feeding your cat something like that? Unless you shop at Whole Foods, most supermarkets sell low-grade canned food and kibbles. Cats’ digestive tracts are resilient, and they can eat cat junk food all their life because these products are induced with pleasant and addictive smells masking the true value of their meals. Regardless, the quality of their life still deteriorates one day at a time — if not rapidly, then slowly. Raw food is ideal, just like what cats would eat in the wild (e. g.: a rat consisting of mostly proteins, sufficient amount of water, and a tiny amount of fruits and vegetables). If not, the best next thing is to buy whole-grade canned and dry food and make sure your kitty is hydrated plentifully. My favorite canned food brands include Weruva, Applaws, Evanger’s, FussieCat, Halo, and Rawz. When I’m out of my house for longer periods of time, I leave out dry food by Orijen or Acana. Do consult a holistic vet — most other veterinarians are trained to sell or recommend low-grade diet to their clients — before transitioning your kitty to a different diet.  

Every cat is different and should be accommodated according to their nature, health, lifestyle needs, and their individual disposition. Just don’t ever forget to think about what’s best for them, resulting in a mutually gratifying and healthy cat-owner relationship. And they’ll just keep purring back to you.     

Main photo courtesy of: Krysten Merriman

 Nadia Gerassimenko is an Assistant Editor at Luna Luna Magazine by day, a moonchild and poet by night. Nadia self-published her first poetry collection “Moonchild Dreams” (2015) and hopes to republish it traditionally. She’s currently working on her second chapbook, “a chair, a monologue.” Visit her at tepidautumn.net or follow her on Twitter: tepidautumn